Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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