If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
