My nipple is on Facebook.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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