Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.