Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
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He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
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I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.