Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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