Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
