Small penises have feelings too.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
