Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
