Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
