It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
