Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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