Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
