Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
We had to coat check the pizza.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Randomize
