the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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