How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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