You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
