bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
