She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
