Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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