You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
