I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
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