Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
