i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
