OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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