we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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