Swine flu. Run for my life!
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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