.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize