Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
