C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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