There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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