there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
