Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
