every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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