your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
17 People Reveal The Reasons Behind Their Foot Fetish
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?