sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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