What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
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