i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
