nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
