I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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