I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
