chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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