Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
