i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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