if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
either way he was missing a nipple.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
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Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
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He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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