Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
