dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
last night I used snow as a chaser
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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