Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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