i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
