Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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