Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Two words: blizzard sex
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize