um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Randomize